Insta Bride – have you read it?

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Chapter One
MISSY
“You need to get laid,” my best friend says
just as I take a mouthful of scotch.
Instead of the smooth alcohol sliding
down my throat, it spurts out of my nose and mouth,
spraying across the bar, and Neil bursts out laughing.
Not funny, Neil.
I swallow the remaining spirits in my mouth only
for the smoky caramel with pear and citrus flavors to
go down the wrong hole and begin choking.
My lungs fail to function as I gasp for air. Holy
crunch apples—if I don’t die, I’ll be amazed!
I manage to splutter a breath in at last between
each painful cough. Oh, crunch apples, my nose,
throat, and lungs hurt.
“Ah, shit,” I hear my so-called friend murmur.
“Sorry, Missy. Are you okay?” Is he kidding me
right now?

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I continue to cough and wheeze while my friend
repeatedly thumps against my back, and I dodge the
next bone-jarring whack. Cheeze burga. I’ll give him,
‘are you okay?’
My sinus cavities and chest burn from the spirits
—I now know how to clean my sinuses, and I don’t
recommend it.
I reach for a napkin off the bar and wipe my face,
and watering eyes. Thank God for waterproof
make-up.
A glass of water appears in front of me, and I
quickly take a mouthful. As soon as I have my
coughing under control and see-through blurry eyes, I
glance up at the annoyed, sexy bartender staring
straight at me.
Sorry, I mouth as I reach for another napkin and
begin mopping up the small puddles of scotch.
What a waste of good liquor!
“Geez, Neil, say it louder, why don’t you,” I rasp
on a shaky breath. “Just for that, you are no longer my
friend.”
I give my best friend I love with all my heart the
evil eye and slowly force air back into my lungs,
making sure I don’t cough one up.
“Come on, Princess, I’m serious. I am more than
your best friend, and you know it. Anyway, when was
the last time you got busy between the sheets?” He
attempts to whack my back again, and I dodge his
outstretched hand. “Any sheets for that matter?”

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I cringe at his words. Why do eligible men seem to
place me in the friend zone or run the other way?
I carefully wipe my face one more time, paying a
little more attention to my burning nostrils, and eye
my best friend up and down. All sexy six-foot-three
hunk of muscle, with his short dark hair, chiseled jaw
with a dimple, and Kingsman suit… and he bats for
the other team.
The carefree, fun-loving, annoying man has
probably had more action in the last week than I have
in the past year or more.
I continue admiring his body. If only I could
persuade Neil to turn Bi.
With my raspy breathing under control, I wait for
him to take another mouthful of scotch. With a
cheeky smile, I innocently mumble, “Can’t you close
your eyes and do me from behind?”
He bursts out laughing between half swallowing
and half spitting his drink out, just missing me.
He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand
and shakes his head. “Oh, Princess, you might have
a fine ass, but girl, no offense, I would never tap
you.”
I frown at his hurtful words and force my chin up,
knowing I should not take his words personally.
He places his empty glass on the bar’s surface,
gently reaches for my hand, and sighs. “Look,
Princess, if I tried tapping your ass with my granite
long cock, it would melt quicker than soft-serve ice

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cream on a thirty-eight-degree Summer’s day in
Sydney.”
“Thanks a bunch,” I grumble, yanking my hand
free and turning my back to him, unsure whether to
feel relieved or insulted. “You know, I could have had
Laini meet me here,” I innocently mutter, knowing
full well, whenever Laini, my old college friend, and I
get together, trouble follows.
“No. I put my foot down, Missy. I will not spring
you from lock-up again. You and Laini together are
nothing but trouble.” Yeah. Well, I will not dispute
that. It’s not our fault men act stupid around us.
Laini’s due to arrive in Vegas tomorrow night for
an author’s conference and a book signing. I was
hoping to catch up with her for a few hours.
“Has she told her family about her being a
published author yet?”
I throw my head back and laugh. “Nope.” I think
her family will have a stroke when they discover little
Laini is a published romance author. A successful one
at that. At least she writes under a pseudonym.
The woman is a well-known editor and journalist
for one of the famous women’s magazines here in the
States. I take another sip of my drink. “Oh, I gave her
some of my new merchandise to hand out.”
“What merchandise?”
“I’m dipping my toes into a printing service. You
know, like business cards, bookmarks, buttons,
banners, and posters. Laini commented ages ago how

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she and other authors are struggling to find a good
printing service who do not rip off their clients.”
Neil nods and sips his drink before asking, “I
didn’t think you were serious when you mentioned it
ages ago.” Great to know my friend has so much faith
in me! “So… how is it going so far?”
Ye of little faith. Thanks, Neil—Not!
“Good, actually.” Initially, I was surprised when
the orders piled in. “Business is picking up. But,
remember, it is a sideline, away from our advertising
business. Something to branch out on in the future.”
Laini had sounded desperate when she required
bookmarks to add to her signed books. With the
know-how and ability, I knew I had to do something.
So I created a couple of mockups. She loved them and
ordered a couple thousand there and then.

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Movement to my right snags my gaze. I
blink twice in shock.
Against the far wall, hiding in the shadows, I can
make out a woman seated between two guys, which is
not out of the ordinary for a bar.
What the…? Surely she’s not doing what I suspect
she’s doing? I focus on her wiggling arms. I blink
again to make sure I am not seeing things. Sure
enough, I can see her arms busy under the table in
both men’s lap.
You got to be kidding me…gross.
I turn and tilt my head to avoid the visual. Only
instead of witnessing their perverted behavior I can
now hear their soft moaning banter.
“Oh, yes, baby…”
“Firmer…”
“Faster…”

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“As if I’d do that,” he says over his shoulder, with
his trademark, over-the-top eye roll.
Yeah…right, Neil. I smirk. Just don’t pick-up in
the men’s bathroom, and chances are you might keep
your shoes safe.
I let out a chuckle and watch him disappear from
my view, working his ‘look at me’ sexy stride. I turn
back to my drink and savor my next sip when
orgasmic groans and grunts drift over from the three
going at it.
Bugger it…I attempt to block out the horny trio. I
focus on the overhead music playing some radio hit
and watch the unaware bartender serving drinks down
the other end of the bar to tune the annoying trio out.
It’s no use, aisle three’s voices increase in volume
and don’t even get me started on the female’s laugh—
as it grates my nerves like fingernails down a
chalkboard.
The owner of the male voice on the left I learn is
Travis, and his partner in crime is Simon. Travis,
Simon, and their female friend, Dolly, have enjoyed
the delights of Vegas, not just at the table but also in
Simon’s hotel bedroom.
Some people have all the fun!
I contemplate what it would be like to spend the
night with two men. What were the logistics of who
goes where and does what?
While lost in thought, my ears perk up when the
nympho group changes the subject and starts on a

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Travis cuts in, “Payback, Simon. Payback.” I hear
both men laugh. Then Travis gleefully states,
“Revenge is sweet, my man.”
Huh? What payback? Reve—
“Come, Princess. Let’s get out of here.” Neil
smiles down at me with way too much enthusiasm,
and I miss when Travis mentions something about a
hotel.
I glance back over my shoulder towards the
shadowed table, and one man moves forward,
illuminating part of his face. He laughs at something
and shifts back into the shadows.
His face seems familiar—do I know him? I shake
my head to clear the thought. Nah, I must be
imagining things. I turn and place my arm around
Neil’s, and we walk arm in arm towards our hotel.
I wonder if aisle three will set their friend up
tonight, or will Tanner escape their clutches?

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Come on…these strangers might be in the
shadows—but in Jack’s Irish Pub. Do these people
have any shame?
Ewww. I turn my head and shudder.
“You cold, Princess?” Neil’s smile is all sincere.
I sigh and angle my head towards the shadowed
table, and Neil glances at the horny bunch before
turning back towards me.
“Right. So action is happening in aisle three. We
sooo gotta get you laid, Princess. Look, we might as
well head back to our hotel bar.”
Feeling defeated, I nod and lift my drink to take
another mouthful.
Why do I sense Neil is feeling sorry for me? He
knows my non-existent luck with men?
After my last failed relationship with Dirty
Darren, I might as well turn into a nun or a born-again
virgin. Who would blame me for going off men after
his money-hungry, cheating ways! At least I have my
successful career to keep me busy and focused.
Lost in my lack of sex life, Neil interrupts my
thoughts. “Missy, I’m going to shake the python. Wait
here for me.”
I let out a laugh. Geez…If I were anyone else, I’d
be offended.
“TMI, Neil. Now, hurry up and don’t dribble on
your shoes.” I know for a fact the man has ruined one
pair of leather shoes, and he still denies it ever
happened.

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new topic on how they are planning on setting up one
of their friends with Dolly.
Seriously…why would they do that? I casually
glance towards them to focus on the woman. She has
big hair, big boobs, and a big high-pitched fake laugh
from what little I can see.
“Tanner is flying into Vegas,” Travis eagerly
snips. I face towards the bar, pretending not to be
listening, and lift my glass to my lips. “I have
everything planned. We smuggle Dolly into Tanner’s
room just before he arrives and set up a secret
camera.”
You have to be kidding me—a secret camera!
Before my imagination travels too far, I hear
Travis continue, “Tanner will find his welcome gift—
Dolly reclined back on his bed with a little sign
‘Welcome to Vegas’ across her tits. With the camera
recording, we’ll also film Dolly fucking Tanner with a
dildo while he’s tied to the bed.” The two males
laugh, and I shudder at the thought of these idiots.
Geez, a freakin’ Xmas, who needs enemies when
you have friends like these two?
If someone tied me up and did that to me without
my consent, I’d call bloody murder.
With my mind racing, I contemplate how Dolly is
going to tie Tanner to the bed.
Smug voices from the shadows grab my attention.
“Travis, it’s going to be a great night!” Simon
gloats. “Three more hours and showtime—”